Radio Free Hard Alley: BREAKING NEWS - In a statement issued to the Alley Press, Un-Mayor OHanlon has absconded his duties as Un-Mayor of Hard Alley and has vacated his crate in the now infamous city square. Discarded cigarrette butts and soiled napkins were last seen blowing freely in the breeze of the quiet city streets, in a scene reminiscent of Hitchcock episodes long past. Traces of the Un-Mayor could not be found anywhere in the shadowed alleys and causeways, and rumors abound that he's vacated his office in pursuit of a higher calling.
So much for the days of laughter and art. This has been radio free hard alley, signing off.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Megan Fox A Magician? She's Disappearing Before Our Own Eyes!!
Radio Free Hard Alley: HOLLYWOOD - Sources in Hollywood tell the AP (Alley Press) that mega-actress Megan Fox now has the same waist size as her eight-year-old stepson Kassius after she put herself on an extremely strict 1,000 calorie-a-day diet. Megan apparently is losing pounds at "an alarming rate" for no apparent purpose, and now weighs just 74lb.
Agents, Publicists and Critics alike are all "weighing in" on Fox's recent thin decline, and many are speculating that the dramatic loss of her once curvaceous figure can be directly attributed to her refusal to eat properly since Un-Mayor OHanlon began to snub her at public appearances.
"Megan is really reeling over her lack of physical contact with Donovan! She's a mess!" told a source close to the actress who requested to remain anonymous....though provided his first name only as "Brian". "She's so detached and numb now, and spends long hours in crying fits and standing naked before the full length bathroom mirror chanting, What's Wrong with Me?! What's Wrong with Me?!" the source added.
Raymond DePaul, a psychiatrist at the very prestigious Johns Hopkins University, said changes in mood and speech and eating can be clues to a manic state of mind. "In terms of self-attitude, patients can be very grandiose, either in the form of being just supremely self-confident, or extremely distructive." DePaul said. "Patients with moderate or even milder forms of mania or hypomania can tell me that they feel invincible, or that there's nothing wrong with them...as in cases of weight."
Reached for comment, OHanlon stated that Fox needs to "fly to Canada and pig out on some McLobster value meals and GET OVER HERSELF! Geez!!" More on this story as Breaking News pours in......
Agents, Publicists and Critics alike are all "weighing in" on Fox's recent thin decline, and many are speculating that the dramatic loss of her once curvaceous figure can be directly attributed to her refusal to eat properly since Un-Mayor OHanlon began to snub her at public appearances.
"Megan is really reeling over her lack of physical contact with Donovan! She's a mess!" told a source close to the actress who requested to remain anonymous....though provided his first name only as "Brian". "She's so detached and numb now, and spends long hours in crying fits and standing naked before the full length bathroom mirror chanting, What's Wrong with Me?! What's Wrong with Me?!" the source added.
Raymond DePaul, a psychiatrist at the very prestigious Johns Hopkins University, said changes in mood and speech and eating can be clues to a manic state of mind. "In terms of self-attitude, patients can be very grandiose, either in the form of being just supremely self-confident, or extremely distructive." DePaul said. "Patients with moderate or even milder forms of mania or hypomania can tell me that they feel invincible, or that there's nothing wrong with them...as in cases of weight."
Reached for comment, OHanlon stated that Fox needs to "fly to Canada and pig out on some McLobster value meals and GET OVER HERSELF! Geez!!" More on this story as Breaking News pours in......
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